Overheard on the Bus

ditzy girl: "Damn! I really need to pee, but I'm wearing new leggings so I can't pee my pants!"

.....um.....as opposed to all those times you had on old leggings and just peed away on the bus?

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boys talking excitedly: "So, you know, South African girls will give it up soooo easy."
"Oh man, but Venezuelan girls are all sluts!"
other boy, visibly annoyed: "Could you guys whisper so those of us with SOULS don't have to hear you?!?"

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lady: So, where do you live?
spaced out man: I live...near a cactus.

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I don't quite know how to incorporate this into the above examples of utter genius, but once, on the bus, a bunch of theater students got on and got everyone singing Bohemian Rhapsody within a few minutes. Even the driver.