I swear, I don't make this stuff up

These continuing and hopefully regular entries will henceforth be referred to as Philisms.

Spoken in reference to Dick Cheney and his... um, "ideas": "He probably masturbates to pictures of things dying."

In reference to a shirt I was wearing that has quickly become a family favorite: "Your, um, nipples, they are...well, they are making a line form across the shirt...It's like a clothesline...between your breasts...um, I just...well, I just like that."

In reference to an issue or matter that has completely escaped our memories: "I'm like real that hasn't been made yet."

One of my personal favorites: While we were both singing along to Frampton's "Ooooo, baby I love your way, everyday" I realized that Phil fancies the song a question-and-answer event that goes; "Ooooo baby I love you when?" at which point the person to whom the question is being asked answers, "everyday!" Even after correcting him, on more than one occasion he has said goodbye to me and just before I shut the door he says "Oooo baby I love you when?... and I always turn and humor him with a hearty "Everyday!" What can I say? We're keeping the fire burning.