Oh How I Used to Make Fun of Other Peoples' Diary-Like Entries...Oh How I Now Have No Room to Talk.

So, when I've had friendship fallouts in the past there usually comes the day when I'm not angry anymore. It happens when I'm looking through pictures or singing songs we used to sing together. I can feel my heart melt, and then all of the anger just leaves. I had a friend in high school who found Jesus and then thought me too pagan to stay friendly with (no, it was not the other way around, I loved her with or without Jesus takin' up permanent residence behind her two top left ribs). I was so angry with her for so long and now I can't remember what it was to dislike her. When I think of her I only smile. She is still the song I sing to myself when I'm alone.

I keep waiting for this to happen in my life today. I feel at peace about my actions and my past, but you know how they say "absence makes the heart grow fonder"? It feels as though absence is making clear so many things that are feeling more and more like betrayal. Instead of slowly replacing anger with love, it's going the other way around.

At the risk of sounding like I've been reading self-help books, I'm wondering what the cost of resolution really is. Is it always possible? Do the things people have done to you and the things you have done to them really matter when held up to the light of the present?